It’s been a long time since I have stood on the shore of an unknown country, knowing I need to find a way across, but without a guide nor a detailed map. But that’s where I am now, standing on the sandy shore of Book Two.
I know the language, the large towns on the journey, the customs. But I don’t know what exactly the experience of them will be like. Knowing where I will stop on the way is not the same as knowing where I will eat that evening, whether the food will taste good.
I’m excited. I want to see these places, hear the conversations, watch the people there, but inevitably there’s fear. Fear I’ll take the wrong path and end up somewhere awful. Fear that I’ll reach the other coast on the far side of the country and realise that I never should have set off in the first place. And there is such crystalline joy in this anticipation. The journey rolling out across the fabric of my imagination is perfect, utterly unspoilt. Experience hasn’t creased it yet.
The ocean roars behind me, breakers smash into the beach. A storm is coming; Hurricane Rejection, yet the tiny glass boats carrying my dream set out all the same, battling the surf, pointing towards that dark horizon. Soon this place I am in will be strewn with the debris of little ships dashed on the rocks and thrown back to shore. Whilst the fear tells me to stay here, with warm sand between my toes, I know that soon this place will be different. When the storm hits, I want to be far inland, enthralled by new places, not hunkered down, hoping the tide won’t take me out to sea.
Yes. Now is the time to move. I’m ready. Sea behind and the unknown ahead. Only forward.
Saint Brendan made is all the way from Ireland to North America in nothing more than a coracle (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coracle).
I have all the faith in the world that your journey will be as safe and successful as his.
Another delicate post, Emma. Your writing is so welcoming. You know you’re going through with this and fear is the little dynamo that powers your heart on. And, yes, there will be wrong turns and confusion and mistakes will be made. And these will turn out to be the most valuable part of it all — turning your book into something that sings. Fear sharpens the senses. Doesn’t make it any less scary, though. At some point it turns to exhilaration. Exciting!
Jason Weaver’s last blog post..Character study
Lucky you! Enjoy it whenever life makes you feel this way. Alive!!
Diana’s last blog post..All wells eventually run dry in the desert, cont.
@ Christy – You have faith in me? That… well… that just blows me away.
@ Jason – *blush*. Thank you. Yes, fear is an important thing, and thank goodness we have it. Without it, what on earth would we do with all of those rollercoasters?
@Diana – You’re right, I will! I’ve been to the place where this doesn’t exist. I never want to go there again.
Gorgeous. Just gorgeous in so many ways.
Diane Whiddon-Brown’s last blog post..Discovering My Writing Process
I’m sending you some steel to reinforce those tiny glass boats!
You’ve faced Hurricane Rejection before and lived to tell the tale, so you’ll be stronger this time around. Let’s hope it doesn’t happen though!
Best wishes for your new journey inland, hope you find plenty of friendship, warmth, comfort and safe places to rest your head along the way.
@ Diane – Thanks…
@ Caroline – You’re right, I have survived, thanks for the reminder. And thanks for coming with me