Friday Flash: Sale or return

The bell that hung above the door jangled as it was opened, but he didn’t look up from his book. If the browser needed him, they’d soon let him know.

“Um, excuse me?”

He sighed and removed his glasses, resting the book down on the counter to look at the customer.

A woman, dressed in distinctly odd clothes, was standing awkwardly in the centre of the shop, holding a large box. He recognised it immediately and stood quickly.
 
“Good morning madam,” he smiled and stepped out to greet her. The rich were always eccentric, perhaps this way of dressing was a new fad in the more fashionable circles. “How can I help you?”

She looked relieved. “This was delivered yesterday,” she nodded at the box. “But I think it’s broken. Or I’m not using it correctly, but I can’t find any instructions.”

He forced his eyes not to roll. Hopeless, each and every one of them. “Well, if Madam would care to put it on the counter, I’ll endeavour to put things right.”

She placed the box on the wooden surface carefully, unhasped the elegant clasp at its top and unfolded the top segments, allowing the four sides of the box to spread out gently, like a flower opening in the dawn sunlight. He couldn’t help but admire his work. The way the panels eased down to rest, and the rich velvet padding inside, still just as pristine as when it left the shop the day before.

He replaced his glasses and moved closer to inspect the contents. The large glass bell jar was still intact, no cracks or chips were evident. The brass clips holding it to the base of the box shone, also intact, so nothing could have got in.

He turned his attention to the contents of the jar, and just like everything else, that looked fine too. A little bad tempered perhaps, but the fairy was hovering a few inches above the base of the jar, still glowing slightly. She didn’t look bruised or sick. Frowning, he turned to the customer.

“Everything looks in order,” he said, trying his best not to let his irritation slip into his voice. “Perhaps you could describe the problem in more detail.”

The customer pulled a piece of paper from her pocket. “This note came with the box,” she said, “”Dearest, hope you love her. They’re marvellous things, you’ll wonder how you survived without one. All my love, M.”

The shopkeeper nodded, remembering the note. “Yes,” he said slowly, inviting her to continue.

“Well, as I said, there are no instructions. It does look like a wonderful thing, is it a hologram? Some sort of robot thing from Japan? I know Marty, my husband, was planning to visit there before he came home.” When his frown deepened, she hurried on, nervously. “There wasn’t a phone number on the delivery slip, just this address, though I can’t believe I’ve never noticed this shop before. I’ve lived here for ten years and I must have walked straight past you a hundred times before!”

She laughed, he didn’t.

“Could you give me your name please madam, I’d just like to check my purchase record.”

“Mrs Hardy,” she said and spelt it.

He went to the ledger and ran his finger down the columns of information. The buyer was a regular, always sent a messenger boy with strict instructions; no doubts there.

“And your address madam?”

“23 Mansion Row.”

He shut his eyes when he read the delivery address. It was there, clear as the bell jar. 23a Mansion Row. The mirror property, not the one it was anchored to. He clicked his tongue in frustration. That damnable delivery boy had done it again. He’d delivered to a mundane.

Well, there was only one thing to do. “Ah yes, I see the error Mrs Hardy, and we’ll have it rectified straight away. You were entirely right, no instructions. I’ll get some sent in and have those and the box returned to you as soon as possible. In the mean time, perhaps you would accept a small compensation for your inconvenience?”
 
Her eyes brightened, darting from one displayed curio to another. “Yes, thank you.”

He crouched below the counter to retrieve his lockbox, opened it with the brass key he wore around his neck. He sifted through several packets, considering which option to take, feeling a strange pity for the woman. It wasn’t her fault after all, and she had been very polite. Not like the last one. That had very messy indeed. So much dust…

He plucked out a piece of paper, locked the box and then went to a shelf, carefully selecting an elegant bottle. She watched him approach with interest.

“We have a range of marvellous perfumes,” he said as he unstoppered the bottle. “If madam would care to sample this fragrance, I’ll send a bottle with the delivery this afternoon.”

He wafted the bottle under her nose and waited for the telltale pupil dilation and glassy stare. She swayed slightly as he pushed the stopper back in and slipped the bottle into his pocket. Out of the corner of his eye he could see the fairy on her back, clutching her sides as she laughed uncontrollably. Horrid things. He was grateful that the bell jar kept the sound locked away.

He steered the woman to the door and stepped out onto the high street with her. The daylight refreshed her, at which point he thrust the piece of paper into her hand.

“Yes, up there, first on your left,” he said. “They sell all the ingredients you need.”

She looked down at the fruit cake recipe in her hand, blinked and nodded. “Oh… thank you.”

He watched her wobble and then walk away. Satisfied, he stepped back into the shop with a sigh. He was never going to finish his book today. The lesson he had in mind for the delivery boy was going to take several hours to prepare…

—

Read the next installment: The Delivery

This Friday Flash is part of a year and a day of urban fantasy stories set in the Split Worlds. There is an index of the the stories here and some more info on what the year and a day is about here. And if you liked it, you can subscribe by email if you like, so you get the rest delivered to your inbox.

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